It wasn't me!

[Anonymous]

Zelph had money! For once in his life, he actually had some money! He'd paid for another round of rent and he still had money! That job he'd taken on with that Creature guy really helped. Who would have known he'd actually get paid so freaking much? So many mercenaries went in; only the two of them came out. OH! And now! People looked at him like he was a killer. That part wasn't so great, but at least it bred a little intimidation in the eyes of other mercenaries. Of course, there was the bit about revenge that didn't seem great, either. People might wanna get revenge for people he hadn't really killed. It was the bug monsters! But who's gonna believe a greedy merc, right?

And what did a man do when he had money? He spent it on alcohol! He was holding a bottle right now! Hah! No bar for him. He'd went straight for the alcohol and said screw the bar atmosphere! Only, now he couldn't find a decent place to have the drink in. He could go back home, but how boring was that? And he could just sit right down here like a bum. He let out an annoyed growl and twitched his tail. Hey, was that somebody ahead of him?

"Hey, is there a decent bar around here?" He wasn't accustomed to this damned area. He got no response from the person. He knelt beside him. "Hey, wake up, you drunk. I asked you a question." He poked the man on the shoulder. No response. He leaned closer to get a listen in on his heartbeat. "Hey. You alive in there?"

Shit! He better not be dead!

[Anonymous]

Joker stirred as he felt someone prodding him. Groaning, he sat up, his sunglasses askew on his face. His stomach hurt from getting punched. Memory started flooding back and he swore loudly, "Fuck! I can't believe I got mugged!"

At least he had his revenge! Joker was broke, so they got away with about 5 bucks. Suckers. And nothing else in his wallet was worth anything. Ha! Crime doesn't pay.

..Not counting illegal street racing. That was totally awesome.

Blinking, he focused on the face of the dude that had poked him. Of course it was a dude. Well, probably good that a smokin' babe didn't see him laid out like this, "Hey. Thanks man."

[Anonymous]

Whoa! The guy was alive! Zelph immediately moved back. At least he didn't have to resuscitate (which honestly, he probably wouldn't have even bothered with) or call somebody over for. Other than being laid out on the ground, he seemed to be all right. Maybe not even drunk. Just mugged, from his own explanation. Zelph believed it--a lot of people were mugged around here. Hell, in the past (and he wasn't sharing this with the guy who'd just been mugged) he'd been known to steal from a person or two. Not exactly mugging them. But yeah. Not exactly a good guy.

"Thanks for what?" Zelph asked. He hadn't done anything! Except poke him awake. Hell, if he'd turned out to be dead, there was little in his scavenging nature that said it would be wrong to take whatever was left on him after being mugged. He got up off the ground and dusted himself off, looking down the street. He hadn't seen anybody else of interest coming from here so whoever did the mugging left an alternate way or the mugging had been done a while ago.

"Hey, so you know a good place to blow money on a drink? I'll pay for yours~"

[Anonymous]

"For not like....kicking me or anything." Joker fixed his glasses and stood up, brushing his pants off. His head hurt like a bitch and he was sore all over, but he had felt worse after some of his crashes.

"What? Hell yeah I do!" Joker grinned, "I know a sweet bar. I go there a lot. It's a motorailer bar, you cool with that?" Thank gods he hadn't had his bike. Probably would have fought a lot harder if Wildcard had been on the line.

He pointed down the street, "I was actually on my way there. Figured I don't work tomorrow, so why not get smashed, yeah? Oh, names Joker! What's yours?"

[Anonymous]

Zelph grinned. "Oh right." Not kicking him. That was actually a pretty logical thing to thank somebody for, especially when you were on the ground after a mugging. (Hey, in this place, who was to say what was right or wrong, anyway? If a man was down, one could kick him all they wanted.)

"Motorailer bar?" Zelph made a face. He knew what a motorailer was. He wasn't exactly motorailer material, but what was the worst that could happen? I could end up mugged myself! He paused for a moment, trying to decide what was better: getting a little wasted with strangers and maybe getting mugged or... Oh hells, he'd already made his decision. He'd fry whoever dared to mug him (if he could remember how when he was totally wasted.) He shrugged. "Cool."

Zelph didn't bother asking the guy's line of work. He didn't know, didn't care. Okay, he was mildly curious but it'd be more fun to speculate than know the truth. He might even be a merc, for all he knew.

"Zelph." He started down the direction Joker had pointed, glancing at the motorailer. "So. Motorailer, eh? Good at it? I'm more of a betting man myself."

[Anonymous]

Joker nodded, beaming as he started down the road to the bar, "Fuck yeah I am. I got a sweet bike and I'm getting a sweet crew together!" So far he had one other rider and a mechanic, but that was okay! It was a start, "It gets the girls like mad, ya know? They love a guy with a good bike."

The bar wasn't far and easily recognizable with the number of nice bikes parked out front, "What about you man? What do you do that let's you buy random guys drinks?" Joker suddenly paused, looking over at the guy funny, "You...aren't like picking me up are you? Joker is strictly a ladies man."

[Anonymous]

Zelph looked back at Joker, raising an eyebrow before a small half-grin appeared on his face. He knew he shouldn't say something stupid, especially not to a man with a possible reputation around here, and especially not on his home turf where anything could happen, but he just couldn't help himself. Making people uncomfortable amused him. "You saw right through me. This is all just a ruse to pick you up."

Yep. He'd planned it all. The finding of him in the alley--heck, he could have sent the mugger on him for all he knew!, the "saving" his ass, and then having him lead him to a bar where he could buy him all the drinks he wanted til he passed out and Zelph could have his way with him. Yep. That was the plan. All along. Psych.

"I'm a mercenary. I fight stuff for money. Some jobs pay more than others. Last job, some twenty or so of us went in. Two of us came out. I kinda made off with a bundle. So no. I don't sell myself for money. At least, not sexually."

[Anonymous]

"Damn, I knew it! It's my movie star good looks. It's a curse, man, I tell ya." Joker grinned, never having been serious and took Zelph to be kidding as well. He loved the ladies, but really, if some guy liked dudes, that was fine. Just wasn't his thing.

Though, Zelph did look a little...poofy. All skinny and pretty features and stuff. Hopefully he wouldn't wake up tomorrow with a sore ass.

"Sell yourself for money? Who brought that up man." Joker laughed, "I haven't paid for sex yet and never plan on it." Which was probably why Joker was still a virgin, but that was not the point, "I'm a totally slick rider. You should totally check a race sometime. Nothing beats um."

Crossing the parking lot, Joker held the door for Zelph. The bar was pretty crowded, but it wasn't too packed. Sweet!

[Anonymous]

"Heh." Zelph grinned back at Joker. At least he wasn't serious. He wasn't in the mood to get his ass kicked, and he was notorious for having just that happen because he couldn't keep his big mouth shut. Some people needed to grow a sense of humor.

Joker was right, though. Nobody had brought up selling oneself. Oops. He supposed his thoughts went there because of the past and because well, naturally, when one brought up this sort of thing, that was just where his mind went. Paid sex. It was boring. Was that a weird thought? Seriously, though. It was. Zelph preferred unpredictable, and you couldn't pay for that. In fact, if you asked for it, you kinda got the same old/same old. You can't ask for unpredictable. Just don't work that way. Still, if he was feeling... uh, frisky, sometimes it was the only choice. Paid companions. Hah.

Walking through the door that was held open, he smirked over his shoulder. "You're a pickier man than me, I'd have to say. Sometimes it's all there is. Guess my looks aren't on par with yours." He grinned some more. He wasn't particularly skilled, to be honest. His experience pretty much only dealt with the boring paid types or the random encounters he barely remembered in an alcohol-induced fog. He needed to get a real life.

He took a look around the joint. It offered pretty much the stuff he'd expect at any other bar. Only, of course, these were all riders. He raised an eyebrow. "I'll have to watch these races sometime. You don't properly live until you've seen a real motorail race." He was being sarcastic, although somewhat sincere. He would watch a race. It just didn't seem all that important to him.

Feeling slightly out of place by the realization that he literally recognized nobody, Zelph felt his ears going slightly back as he moved a little more through a thicker part of the crowd. He was a social person, but not the butterfly type. More like the fly on the wall type. Reaching what he hoped was the bar, he set his hand on the counter.

"Strongest thing you got!" he declared boldly, then gestured to wherever Joker had got to. "And something for him. Whatever he wants." His right ear twitched as he felt somebody brush by, touching his tail in their wake. He hated that. His tail moved instinctively closer to his body and he threw the offending person a dirty look.

[Anonymous]

Joker laughed at Zelph's comment and smacked him on the back, "You'll see man. And watchin' at as good as riding. It's a pale pale second. It's a rush like nothing else. And, you know, babes in really tight leather."

Taking a seat, Joker raised an eyebrow at the strongest comment, "Whoa. You got way more balls than I do man. I'll just have some rum and whatever soda's handy." Joker didn't like straight booze and shots made him cough like a little girl.

"So, not to be rude or nothin' but, like, what are you? Like a fox or something?"

[Anonymous]

"Yiiikes." Zelph reeled forward a step as he was smacked unexpectedly on the back. His glare was mild and short-lived as he glanced over at Joker. After a moment, he joined the man and sat down, straightening his clothes, even though they didn't necessarily need it. He ignored the hot babes in tight leather comment altogether. The idea didn't appeal to him, but he wasn't going to say as much.

"It doesn't take balls to drink the strong stuff. Just an escapist personality." Settling more comfortably into his seat he waited for the drinks to arrive without much interest. Generally, the strongest shit also happened to be the worst tasting and smelled like a permanent marker. But he was feeling good tonight. With his haul, he wanted to get smashed and gamble away whatever he had. He could buy something nice, but what would he do with it? He barely spent more than his sleeping hours in his home and he always found other modes of transportation, so who needed to bother with a vehicle? What else was there?

"How is that rude? It'd be more rude if you were touching stuff that doesn't belong to you." He shot a mild glare at whoever it had been moving past him earlier. "Just a vulpes. So yeah. Fox."

As his drink was set down before him, he pulled it closer. Yep. Smelled like permanent marker. He didn't drink just yet, though.

"What're you? Other than a rider? Or do you define yourself by your... What is this exactly? Hobby? Job?"

[Anonymous]

"So like...you half fox or somethin'? I donno what a vulpin is. Sounds like an alien." Joker took a drink from his glass and gave a small smile at the taste. That hit the spot! There were too many aliens and mutants and weird races to keep track of them all, "I like the ears and tail though. I bet those are a hit with girls. They look soooft."

He took another drink and grinned, "Neither. Riding is my life man. Nothing beats it. My hobby is ladies and my job is garbage collection." He hated admitting his day job. He wasn't ashamed of it, but it just never sounded very...cool.

[Anonymous]

"I don't know the whole history of my race. I never cared to learn," Zelph freely admitted. "But probably somebody went and fucked a fox." He grinned. "And centuries later, here I am. Thank the fates for bestiality."

He raised his eyebrows, his right ear twitching at the "compliment" to his ears and tail and he looked down into his drink for a moment. "They got lady vulpes. You should find a nice little vixen. They're pretty wild. So I hear."

He wasn't about to get into his mother's livelihood. He took a drink and nearly cursed at the kick of the drink. Shit was definitely the strongest they had. If it wasn't, he didn't think he really had the balls to try something harder. "Whoo." He grinned as it burned going down. "That's the stuff. Shit'll knock a person out in two rounds."

A half smile popped up. "Garbage collection. Sounds like my job." He took another drink. He really ought to warn Joker he wasn't the best drinking buddy to have around.

[Anonymous]

"Aw, gross man!" Joker laughed at that, taking another drink, "I so don't wanna think about that!" Joker's expression turned a little more eager at the mention of vixens, "Oh, seriously? You know any? Hook a brother up man! I would be your friend for life!"

Because pathetic begging was always sexy. He took another long drink when as he watched Zelph try his own, "Man, I told you that shit was stroooong! Careful you don't take it too fast. I'll stick with my bitch drink."

[Anonymous]

Honestly, Zelph didn't want to think too hard about how his race came into being, either. Vixens were a better subject. He thought about them. The few he knew. It wasn't like this place was crawling with them or anything. "Yeah, I guess I could hook you up." He didn't see why not. Joker looked like just their type. Maybe not a glamorous day job, but the ladies were a sucker for a motorailer dude. It gave off a certain image. Zelph's lips turned up in a smile. He felt it going right to his head. Yeah. He should really warn him.

"Hey. Man. Don't let me order another one of these," he said, lifting his glass. Man, he was so buzzed. He set it down again with a harder clunk than necessary. He shook his head quickly. "Damn that shit's strong!" He downed the rest.

[Anonymous]

"Ah man! That would be so sweet! Seriously man, you are awesome." Joker beamed at the guy and finished off his drink. The getting mugged part of this evening had sucked, but it was going uphill quickly. And he really wasn't even that sore for getting beat up! Bonus!

"I told you!" Joker laughed, "You should have listened. They don't fuck around with their drinks here. Try something a little lighter man." He signaled the bartender for another one of his, feeling pleasantly warm from the last one.

[Anonymous]

Putting his head down on the counter, he smiled, perhaps looking a little dopey, but feeling pretty damn nice. This was how life should always be. Nice and slow and sweet. Like honey. Nah. Honey was actually kinda gross. Maybe more like... More like... He closed his eyes for a long moment. He heard Joker talking and he nodded like he understood. It took him another long moment, then he understood the words that he was hearing. He opened his eyes, but didn't bother trying to sit up. He had a feeling it would all rush to his head if he attempted it. And then he'd fall flat on his ass. And probably start laughing, because right now, nothing would hurt.

"Lighter. Lighter, beer," Zelph instructed the bartender. "You really weren't lying. No sirree. No fuckin' around the drinks around." That made no sense, but he wasn't actually listening to himself.

[Anonymous]

Joker blinked, realizing the other guy was already plastered. Damn! It wasn't often Joker got to out drink anyone! He ordered himself a shot as well, just to play catch up. "Just my luck I get bought drinks by a dude who can't hold his liquor." He grinned, "If you were a girl I could at least hope for lower standards."

Well, once he had gotten a bit drunker, he would have to drag the guy home. Couldn't really leave him here and he didn't know where the guy lived. He tossed back the shot and gasped at the burn from it.

[Anonymous]

"Hey! I heard that," he said, his left ear twitching at the insult. That was an insult, right? He'd just said a girl could out-drink him! Right? Wasn't that he was implying? Or maybe even outright saying, except that he was so wasted he didn't quite comprehend everything as well as he might have otherwise. When the bartender came back with what he thought was a lighter beer, he took a long drink. What the...? He looked down at his glass, sniffing it. "Is this... Water?" He gave the bartender's receding back an annoyed half-glare. It was. Oh, he got the picture. Still, he was thirsty and in a bar and everybody else was drinking, so he took another long drink of the water. It wasn't doing much, but he did chance sitting up straighter, swiveling his chair around so he could get a better look around the bar. Whoa. He didn't recognize anybody. His gaze went to Joker. Except him.

"Nobody I know here," he said, leaning forward and swaying slightly. He leaned back then, his elbow resting on the counter behind him. "Vixens aren't the only ones good in bed," he said, arching his eyebrows up and smiling suggestively. His tail curled around one of Joker's legs.

[Anonymous]

"Awww, relax." Joker gave a small laugh, not really sure what he was offended about, but the drinks were starting to work and he felt warm and fuzzy. He got another shot for himself when the bartender brought Zelph water. Good plan. Man, when he had wanted the strong stuff, Joker thought the dude was a drinker. Guess not.

He blinked down when he felt something on his leg. A tail. Whoa. Joker lifted his head to stare at Zelph, not putting two and two together yet, the alcohol slowing his not that quick to begin with brain down, "Really?"